argh!!!!!!!! 1 word, PAIN!


inside pain, outside oso pain...


outside pain is obvious, my sun burn.. now anything touches it no matter how light, also PAIN!!!! even the gentle touches of the shower water when i bathe. -_-


inside pain is because i change new form... my old form don look good and i have a rough idea how it came about now...
the form i used is to conserve my strength... as u all noe my body size is damn skinny so nothing to withstand my freaking heavy bow weight... so my form is tailored to my bow... and i do well with it.

now, i wanna change to standard form, so everything must straight line. but straight means when i anchor, body tension is still present and is 44lbs... this is correct to have correct push pull. my old form is to lock my arm so tension will ease off, to save my energy... so i can last longer...

now, i get very tired even after like just 12 arrows? how sia... i need minimum of 60 arrows den can tired.. my old form can handle hundreds of arrows on my 44lbs bow.. now cant even handle 12. dilemma u noe..

but now i have time to next compe, so i guess i will push the limits to change my form den to stay put.

the pain now is unbearable.




haix... i'm only posting this thing here... outside i'm the strong and unyielding Eugene CHIAM! only here, u can get to see where i truly break down... truly admit stuff that i dont admit on e outside. and say out the things from the deepest depths of my heart.


in time i trust i can learn to handle my original bow.. but truly, my main motive is to help u. most stuff i do outside is just to show ppl, to justify what i'm doing. so that they wont say anything. i do things all fully planned, its hard to know without asking me. and i only reveal the truth to e person deepest in my heart.. =)