oh man..

day's as usual, training at zhenghua from 8-4. My mood was way way low today... totally dont have the mood to shoot.. yup i've seen things i would have cried looking at.. but take a deep breath.. *out of words*

ok.. i really needa go back to church and thank god soon... he is really sheltering me like forever? I though i was left to fend for myself today.. To my very suprise, Mr Chang understands and talked sense into me.. it helped.. a little.. thanks MR CHANG.

men must be xiao sa.. cannot lose your cool... you may have done very wrong things, but there will also be things you've done no one can ever replicate. she've chose this road herself, let her bear the fruits and sorrows herself. It have nothing to do with you now.. what is yours will eventually be yours.

anyways, yea i have not really made her very happy or accommodated her in a way that she liked very much. always doing things i think will be good for her not caring if she likes it. have always been behind the scenes preparing, creating and working. behind the curtains and never really been infront of it to enjoy the moment and what i had.
I should learn more to focus on the process and not solely on the outcome..
*so... i paid the ultimate price of losing her*

ya thinking back, its really quite bu ke shi yi (impossible). I ended up in ite because i was lazy to appeal at rp myself.. its odds were so low too...
next getting into the same class and knowing her was quite low in the odds too... people from different backgrounds and locations.. i didnt even know sembawang is on the red line..
next was getting together with her, she had a bf which i didnt really like to cross path with.. but yea, we overcame it.
next was her getting pass my stage and family's stage.. it was nearly impossible, but it happened.
next was breaking up, it didnt happened to me before so i didnt expected it will happen..

yes it all is bu ke shi yi.. like a dream. a dream i do not wanna wake up from.


*if we're meant to be*
没有你的第52天