11/11/10 Reflection Journal
Describe a situation or occasion which you have lost control in. Explain how you dealt with it.
In life, I pretty much know what I want and how much I am willing to give to achieve my goals. The only two occasions that I really felt that I’ve lost control was the passing of my grandmother and my 1st breakup.
My grandma and I were pretty close from birth as I have both parents in the working class and do not really have time for me. My grandma had been bedridden for 10years through a stroke when I was primary 2 and that lasted for a full 10years. As the days went by, I have accepted the fact that she was unable to lead a normal life like before but was still able to communicate with me and I do see her every week. Until 2 years ago when I was in ITE, it was the 31st of August 2008. I was having a major archery competition which spans the Saturday and Sunday. I did not do that well on Saturday and plan to have a good night’s rest and do better tomorrow. It was on that night at 4am, my family received a call from my aunty who look after my grandma saying that she is afraid that my grandma cannot pull through and ask all of us to go back.
My mum came in to call me up and I actually told her that I am having a competition in 2 hours time and I need this time to sleep and I will visit her right after my competition, so I went back to sleep. At 5.05am, my mum send me an sms saying that grandma passed away.
After reading that sms, I sat up and stunned with tears rolling down thinking that I didn’t see my grandmother for the last time. Words cannot express how I felt then. I continued and went for my competition. The whole day it was drizzling and it’s how I was feeling. I delivered and won a gold medal for my team before rushing down to her wake. I showed my mum the medal and she said, is this medal worth it? Even your grandma is watching over you. Words cannot describe how I felt that moment. Only tears did.
I know whatever happened cannot be changed. The thing I can do now is to work hard and not let her down.
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